Oils here, there, and everywhere!!

So, I posted about some of our success with essential oils.

Here's a few more.....

* I was frying taquito's in REALLY HOT vegetable oil...you know what comes next...

I burned myself when the vegetable oil splashed on my finger. My immediate reaction was cold water, BUT WAIT! I'd just read that lavender was good for burns. So I went and got my doTerra Lavender oil and put just ONE DROP on the burn. Then I got out my book and looked up what to put on burns, the only other one I have on hand is doTerra's Melaleuca. So, I used ONE DROP of that. The pain was gone almost immediately!! Later when I did the dinner dishes, I could just barely feel the sting of the hot water. Just barely enough to remind me I had burnt myself. The next day, nothing was there! Not even a pink spot!!!

* We spent last Saturday building grow boxes for the garden. My son #4 is highly allergic to mosquito's. He is covered in bites. This is my developmentally challenged child. He doesn't always articulate his needs very well. He asks for "oils" when he gets itchy! He will come and get me and just keep repeating "Oils, oils, oils!" until I get out the Melaleuca and rub some on each spot :)

* Daughter got a bite of some sort on her knuckle. Noticed it right in the middle of Sacrament Meeting. I reached in my purse and got out my handy dandy travel kit, and handed her the lavender and the melaleuca. Gone by the end of the  hour!

*Honey has been battling sudden leg cramps for years. These cramps will start mid thigh and go straight up to the groin. Not a pleasant experience! He had a sudden attack the other night so I immediately grabbed my book and looked up Charlie Horse/cramp. I rubbed on what oils I had for that. I used peppermint, vetiver, cypress, clary sage and lavender. Last, I rubbed on the Deep Blue cream. When I finished with the cream I asked if the pain had lessened, and his reply was "Yes. After one of the first couple oils." Yay!

My two youngest boys have different issues, one has the developmental (autistic-like) and the other hyper (ADHD-like, with a side of OCD). I've been using a blend of oils called InTune by doTerra that works pretty well. I also have been using a blend by a fellow "Oiler" called Jeddy's Blend. I've had varied results, likely determined by the stimulus that is happening around the boys and the extenuating circumstances. If the boys seem to be getting out of hand, whomever is helping me asks "Have they had their oils?" The oils truly are making a difference!

*At bedtime, we are using a couple of blends, Serenity, Balance and good 'Ole lavender! Both the blends are from doTerra. This stuff works! Some say as well as Ambien! I'm here to say...YES it does! I tried the blend for anxiety issues. I was having what my daughter and I refer to as a "Lucas" day. I was thinking of him, and having a hard time of it. Just missing him terribly. I tried this blend and within an hour or so, my head was on my laptop keyboard! I think if I didn't drink so much caffeine, it may have worked faster!!

*Migraines. Ugh. Bane of my existence for most of my life. I had one recently that just wouldn't go away, and only kept getting worse. To top that day off, I was babysitting (with my daughter) my GB's along with my own two crazies (if any of you get migraines, you know rowdy, fun loving, small children and migraines don't mix). I finally grabbed the Past Tense from doTerra and tried that. The Advil wasn't cutting it. Within about a half hour the intensity off the migraine had settled into a nagging headache. One more round of oil and Advil before bed and it was gone. I never had to break out the prescription meds. I was shocked at the way the oils knocked more than half the pain away!

*Headaches...yeah, it knocks them out! The difference between a headache and a migraine is soooo different. I call headaches the wimpy lil' cousin to the migraine! The first time I had a regular, run-of-the-mill headache after that first time trying the Past Tense oil, I was actually excited to try it again! I wanted to see how well it would work on wimpy cousin! BAM! GONE! Love it! And it smells good!

*Youngest son #5 came down with the crud. Runny nose, hacking cough. Lasted for what felt like forever. He seemed mostly over it before my Honey and I left for California (gone for 4 ½ days). But when we got back I noticed he was still coughing. He asked for medicine, but instead I got out the oils. I looked in the book and found which ones to rub on his chest for coughing. It calmed the coughs down immediately. We did the same routine morning and night for two or three days. Then it was finally gone! Presto!

*My oldest son came over for dinner on Mother's day. He had been sick for about a week at that point. Same crud as our other four kiddos. He got it from them. The next morning, my throat was sore. great. Then my ear started hurting. 

NO.WAY.

I refused to be sick.

I got out the OnGuard from doTerra and rubbed a drop down the side of my throat that was hurting. Then I put a drop behind my ear. I did a repeat application about an hour later. By bedtime, it was all gone. No pain, and I never came down sick!

I'm a believer in the healing qualities in pure essential oils.

 I believe that with caution and care they can help and heal. 

  

Keesha's Amazing Therapy Oil Story!!

Keesha in front

Tiger in back

My in-laws moved last Fall, and couldn't take their Pomeranian's with them. We kept them here with us. They had already been living here for the last 7 years or so, and were used to it, so they stayed. Well, Keesha, the 12 year-old female, has a cataract in her right eye. That eye is also abnormally swelled up. I don't know the reason behind that. I suspect that it had something to do with having a seizure. She has them on occasion. Back in March she suddenly had what we called an "eye explosion"

Day one

March 23rd, 2013

Day one

(I don't have any more picture of during treatment, but take my word for it, this is just the beginning! It got MUCH worse!!)

Her eye was so swollen she couldn't close it. It was infected looking and gross. It developed a crusting on it. I was certain she would have to have it removed. I was positive. There couldn't be any other choice. Surgery would be almost $400. We couldn't afford that. I talked to my mother in law. I came to the conclusion that we would have to surrender her to the TNSPCA. They would be able to help her. I didn't want to put her down. She wasn't having any other problems, was eating and drinking, pottying and playing like normal. I kept praying for guidance. What should I do for this poor dog!? 

The answer came....

Put coconut oil on her eye.

 I had tried some rx eye antibiotics. But she flinched and wasted the last three eye drops of the bottle. Coconut oil. 

I would wash her eye with Bausch and Lomb eye wash. She could NOT close her eye.It was three times the normal size!! It was so dried out and sore looking. Crusty.

Coconut Oil

OKAY!!!

I called Gabi. Could I borrow some coconut oil? She had the fractionated oil. It stays liquid. I checked with Dr.Google and found that Myrrh is used in eye medications. I asked Gabi for some Myrrh. She brought it down. Saw Keesha's eye....GROSS! It was horrible by this time. It had been 3-4 days. She mixed the coconut oil, and the Myrrh. 1tsp coconut oil, 10 drops of Myrrh. Then we put a drop in Keesha's eye. Maybe more like coated the eye. Then we left her alone.  Two days, maybe three, her eye had crusted so bad, I had barely any hope. Then the crust fell off. Can I say  FREAK OUT??!!I Totally freaked. But her eye was intact, there was a pink opaqueness to it. I thought, OH crap! I've made it worse! But the feeling was that I was supposed to keep doing this for her. So I continued using the blend until it ran out. Then I changed it up a bit when I made the next batch.

Keesha's Blend

I used 1tsp fractionated coconut oil

5 drops Myrrh oil

5 drops Lavender oil

Her eye has continued to heal. There was a three day period where she didn't get any oils, and she developed an infection of some sort. Pus was involved. EEEEW! But I got the oils back on her and it cleared right up. Instantly. The opaque pinkness had long since cleared up. I was checking her yesterday and noticed that there's a much smaller area of cataract on her eye! I'm so excited! I'm going to keep oiling her eye until I see no changes whatsoever! She used to be very crabby. A grumpy little, half hairless, brat. She hated anyone touching her. She was selective shall we say? Well, the other day we were leaving and she was hopping around my feet wanting some attention. Not food, not to be let back in the house. Just wanted some attention! She didn't used to want me to touch her face, let alone hold it to put oil on. Now she just sits there and waits for the oils. Amazing!

Most of the swelling is down, it's basically back to "normal"

at least normal for her.

Here you can see what's left of the cataract.

Before

After

Before

After

I'll continue to update!!!!

Lucas' Story (Part Two)

Part Two

(Read Part One before reading Part Two)

The weather was beautiful. It was the first Spring-like day we had had so far. There were white, puffy clouds in the sky. It was warm enough for short sleeves. 

We we're in the beginning stages of the worst day of our lives.

The boys had been playing outside. Now they were gone.

Our property sits between the railroad on the east side, and the highway on the west.

We have a picturesque meandering road that leads up to our property. 

11½ acres of trees, lots of room for the kids to play. Jump on the trampoline's. Chase the dogs, or the cats, or the chicken's, or maybe the cow.

Ride bikes, scooters, or other ride-on toys.

Our front yard is big enough to play soccer.

We have a basketball hoop. 

My point is...there were plenty of things to do here....on the property.

Gb1 and #6 were glued from day 1. They were pretty much exclusive. They did their thing. GB3 is still a baby (20 mo), #5 has his own way of playing, mostly by himself, or watching tv, but Lucas would play with him and vice-versa. Bringing me to the fact that GB1 didn't want to play with the boys that day. He wanted to be with his Mom. My #5 was at school. My daughter was gone with a friend. My son #4 was working on his truck. My DIL and I were in the camper, completely unaware of the tragedy that had just fallen upon us. 

My 2nd point is that it was totally out of character for Gb2 and #6 to be alone together. 

Point 3: my daughter never leaves! Not in the morning hours during the week.

Point 4: Gabi NEVER lets the boys outside alone.

Gabi's Recollection of that day
(precedes the rest of my story)
A Birthday Party Turned Into A Funeral

I didn't know the number one cause of children's death in the USA is drowning aside from heart defects. My superman experienced both. Fortunately he had life saving surgery as a baby that repaired his heart and after have one of the most normal childhoods there was an accident 4 days before his 3rd birthday. Lucas went missing, he ran down the road with his uncle Wyatt (Wyatt's 4 years old) to get rocks with a dump truck, while we were searching for them on the property not thinking they would run off to far they made it so far down the road no one could hear me screaming when I found them. Wyatt came running down the road say "he fell in the river, he dead he dead!!" I started telling Wyatt to shut up he's not dead and show me. I told Nicholas not to leave the car while it was parked in the middle of the little dirt road with the door open. I called nick told him I found Wyatt and what Wyatt told me then I told him to tell his mom, she was still at the houses looking, I ran down to the creek screaming for help the entire time, once I got to the creek I gave Wyatt my phone and told him to go back to the car, I'm not sure if he listened but he knew not to come in the water, I started running down the creek searching the water thinking he might have sunk down to the bottom but after a few minutes I saw something white down by the creek, that was the longest minute or two of my life. I kept falling and struggling to get to him. Once I got to him I lifted him out of the water and carried him to the side so I could start CPR. While I was doing this I noticed his blue face, the bruises all over his head from the rocks, his clothes were soaked, his shoes gone. It was the worst moment of my life. After what seemed like hours but may have only been 20 minutes of CPR nicks mom and brother showed up with Nicholas and Wyatt in the car. She was crying asking if he's ok. I told her "he's dead" she screamed "no". Brigham (nicks brother) came running down the creek with what looked like such ease he took Lucas to the car and handed him to a stranger that just happened to hear the screams. Brigham came back to help me. I was soaked to my shoulders from falling and slipping on such sharp rocks, I was in shock and couldn't hardly move. Once I got to the car I stated CPR again. 911 had been called by then but it still took about 10 min for someone to get there. Once the cop showed up he took over CPR. After the ambulance came about 4 more trucks and SUVs came to help save my little boy. We left to the hospital a little but latter and once we got there they started working on him in such an intense way people yelling for things, trying to intubate him. After a little while longer nick and his dad got there.
After working on him for about 30-45 minutes they got his heart beat back, and after the doctor told us it doesn't look good we finally got a pulse and he started trying to breath on his own. We were so sure that meant he would be ok. He left for lifeflight to Vanderbilt children's in Nashville so we had to get a ride home to pick up our car and we grabbed some of Lucas's clothes too thinking he would come home at some point. The little boys asked if he was dead we told them "No he's just sick". We rushed to the hospital and finally got to see him after waiting FOREVER!! He was unconscious but looked so good! He had color!!! People came to visit him make sure everything was ok, we sang to him, told him how much we loved him, begged for him to move!
HE GRABBED NICKS HAND FIRST THEN MINE!!! I was so excited!!! The doctor said that he isn't responding to pain so they don't "know" why exactly he will squeeze our hands but not respond to pain or his pupils won't redoing to light. They just kept saying it doesn't look good but we were sure he would be fine. After a while his heart couldn't handle to stress anymore, his organs weren't responding so good anymore and his heart was beating out of whack. They told us that it will be like this (the continuous crashing) until he dies, or we can stop doing what were doing and you can hold him.

So we held him.
At 3:52am on February 19 2013 we lost our superman. The toughest little guy in the whole world was gone.

My Story Part Two

Worst day of all our lives. Gabi, I DID hear you scream. I was in the yard yelling for you, Lucas and Wyatt. Dad called me and kept telling me that you and Brigham were at the railroad tracks. I got to the tracks and saw the car, and the dump truck by the side of the road. But I didn't see you. I picked up the dump truck and that's when I saw Wyatt coming up the road. I saw that he was wet and that's when I started panicking. I threw the truck in the car, told Nicholas to get in the back seat, saw a truck coming up the road and saw Brigham down the path of the tracks. All in one second. I grabbed Wyatt, who was now at the car. I asked him where Gabi was, and he said "She's went to get Lucas. He's in the creek. He's dead". Now I hit full panic mode. I screamed for Brigham. The driver of the truck pulled up next to me and asked if I needed help. I told him that my grandson was lost and he might be at the creek. Brigham got in the car and I peeled out getting down the short stretch of road to the creek. The guy in the truck followed. Driving down the road to the creek I saw your flip- flops, I knew it was where you found Wyatt. When I got to the creek, I instinctively went to the second drive. As I pulled up, I somehow had the presence of mind to put the car in park, and Brigham and I jumped out. I started screaming for you, I guess you answered because Brigham took off in your direction. I looked that way and saw you on the bank of the creek some ways down from where we were. I didn't want to leave the boys in  the car alone, so I just kept yelling to you asking if he was ok. I never heard your answer over the drone of the water and my own hearing loss. Brigham was bringing him back towards me at that point. I yelled across the creek at him if Lucas was ok. I just remember yelling "Is he ok?!" over and over. In one glaring second burned into my brain, I saw Lucas' arm fall, and Brigham shake his head "no". That's when I started screaming "NO!" I lost it. I put my arms out and made Brigham give Lucas to me. You were making your way back down the creek at that point. I took Lucas from Brigham and started back toward the car. I think I was still crying "No!" I tripped and fell to my knees. I blew air into Lucas' mouth. Praying that he would choke out water and start breathing. I couldn't get up while I held him , so I handed him back to Brigham and he carried him to the car. The neighbor in the truck was at the car. They laid him on the ground and started CPR. Right then you made it to the car as well. You told them to put Lucas on the hood of the car. CPR was continued at that point. I ran and grabbed a towel out of the car, and gave it to you. Brigham handed me the phone and I called 911. It seemed to take forever for the first responder to get there. Then finally the ambulance. I sat in the car with the little boys and tried to keep them calm. Brigham went back to the house to be with Sirius and wait for Danny to get off the bus. When I got to the hospital, I remember counting 13 people working on Lucas at any given moment. I remember how amazed I was at your ability to remain calm. I was such a mess. You were calm in the face of the storm. I envied you your strength! When they yelled they had  breath and a pulse, was the only moment you broke. As well as EVERYONE in that wing of the hospital! Everyone there was pulling for Lucas! When we finally got to see him at Vanderbilt I still had hope! I had noticed his little nostrils flaring with every breath he took. I thought for sure that was a sign that he would be ok. He had tears, I wiped them away while I stood next to him. I wanted to stay for every possible second. I didn't want to leave the hospital. But we went home. I laid in your bed, holding Lucas' pajamas, the last thing I had seen him wearing, and willed him to be ok. All the while watching facebook for any new details you would post. You posted that he squeezed yours and Nick's fingers! That he twitched his leg! I prayed that we would be bringing him home. Then Nick sent me a message that Lucas was crashing. I got Dad and we got in the car to go back to the hospital.

Almost three miles down the road, we got the call that Lucas had crashed. It was the longest ride ever. Longest hour ever. When we got to the hospital, in the PICU, I noticed signs on all the doors to the rooms. When we got to Lucas' room, they had placed a picture of a black butterfly. I started crying. I knew what that meant. He had earned his wings. We went in and took turns holding  him. They came in and placed him in the little red wagon to take him away. I still couldn't believe he was gone. He was truly a Superhero! He touched so many hearts in his young life! He is truly missed by all. But will forever be in our hearts! I love you Gabi! I am so glad you married my son! You are an awesome Mom to your boys! They all know how much you love them! They are happy, funny, crazy smart kids! Lucas' life may have been short, but it was packed full of love and great memories!

Lucas' Story (Part One)

Part One

I have taken my time with this post. Not because I want it to be perfect, I do, but because it's just so hard to do.

Lucas

He's half the reason I started this blog. The other half was a combination of his brother, his parents, and the fact that I thought blogging would be kinda fun. This post is SO not fun.

Back when I started this blog, Lucas had just been born. February 22, 2010. He had had a rough start. He had several heart defects (Transportation of the Great Arteries, Double Outlet Right Ventricle,Coarctation of the Aorta, and Ventricular Septal Defect ). While my son and his wife were spending almost all their time (she actually lived there- THANK YOU to the Ronald McDonald House!!!) at the hospital, they needed someone to watch their young son. My Honey made the drive to Utah (with his Dad and sister) and after a few days, brought GB1 home to stay with us, Gramma and PawPaw. We absolutely LOVED having him here! It honestly was like having triplets! I had my two young sons as well, who were ages 3 and 1. My one year old (at that time) and my GB1 are only three weeks apart in age, and my 3 year old was developmentally about the same age....so, yeah, triplets.

My daughter in law was so sad to be separated from her son (I would be too!), so my son signed me up on Skype. Which was nice. But, I wanted to be able to send her pictures of things going on as well. Hence, the blog. I figured I could post things for her to see when we couldn't Skype (sometimes they would Skype, only to find out their son had gone to bed). I wanted them to be able to see his goings-on. After a while Skype became the usual way for them to keep up, and the blog withered for posts about GB1. But, I kept blogging. Very infrequently.

After almost exactly 3 months, GB1 was finally reunited with his parents and little brother.

Back up a bit......Lucas was born needing heart surgery. They knew he would have to undergo several surgeries before he was even born. He had his first surgery the first day of his life.They had to do a bedside procedure where they inserted a catheter into the Atriums and filled it up to make a balloon, then pulled it through the walls to make a hole so the blood could mix. Then later, he underwent the major surgery to fix his defects. We were so scared. He made it through all of his surgeries like a champ! It was amazing to me. They found out at one point that he needed more surgery. His lack of blood flow had caused part of his small intestines, and part of his colon to die. They had to go in and remove 1/3 of his small intestines, and half of his colon. It would make digestion difficult. He made it through all of that like a champ as well. He was such a little trooper! For the next year we just saw pictures on Facebook, or we Skyped with the kids and got to see the GB's. Gabi had another baby, another gorgeous little boy! Two months later we got to go to Utah and visit!!!! I was SOOOOOOO excited! I was finally going to get to see those boys! They came to where we were staying and the first one to come around the corner of the kitchen where I was, was Lucas! He looked up at me, smiled his smile and I was smitten! I picked him up and hugged him like crazy! I showed him the "puppy". I taught him to say "Cooper", which in his little voice came out "Tooper". He eventually wiggled away, and I took his baby brother for the rest of the evening, except feeding times. I hugged and loved on Lucas as much as I could. GB1 was being a stinker and hiding or running away from me...such a two year old! lol We only got to visit four or five times while we were there. It was the Summer of 2011. Lucas was 1 ½ years old.

More Skypeing and Facebook. An occasional phone call from the GB's :)

Then, December 2012.

My son called and said they were moving back home. 

I. Was. Elated!!!!

I couldn't wait!

The biggest part of our family would all be here! All of my kids, minus Jake, who is still serving his mission. We decided that for the sake of my daughter in law's sanity..lol..we would move back in to the house, and they could move in to the mobile home. It needed less repairs than the house. I felt she needed a home, not a major project. I wanted her to feel comfortable where she was, I knew she wasn't really wanting to leave her family, so I wanted it as nice as possible. They arrived on February 2nd. Gabi's birthday was just  around the corner. Lucas' birthday was on the 22nd. My Honey and my daughter at the end of the month. I planned on being busy!! Lots of cakes. lol GB3 had been sick right before they moved. He was still recovering. Poor thing was so gunky, and congested! The week end of Gabi's birthday we went out dinner. Had a nice night.

On Sunday Gabi stayed home from church with GB3. The rest of us went to church. I was feeling some pretty strong Mother's Pride with my son and his two boys sitting in the pew in front of us!!! My heart did swell! I was looking forward to Gabi and GB3 being there the following week! During the 3rd hour, the Primary President came and got me. Lucas needed changing. My son had forgot the diaper bag. We scrounged in the trunk of his car and found some wipes and a diaper. They still had bags of stuff in there from the move. I took Lucas in the Mother's Lounge and changed his diaper. As any Mom will know, when you change you kids diapers, you tend to talk and say silly things with your child. There are certain phrases you come up with that signal certain responses from your child. Some of the ones I use are "up up up" or "up-ey do" I remember that day I said "up up up" trying to get him to help me get his diaper under him...ya'll know what I mean. He repeated what I was saying. I can still hear him saying "up up up!' and see the smile on his face. There were only a few minutes left of church. Maybe 15. I asked if he wanted to go back to nursery, but before I could get all the words out he was already turning the knob to go in. I watched him go in and shyly sit back down at the table for snack. He had the biggest smile on his face!!! He colored a picture to take home that day. I could just picture him in a couple of weeks sitting in Primary for the first time! He would LOVE it!

The following week is a blur in my memory. I don't remember seeing much of the kids or the GB's. I did go back there on Valentine's Day and help Gabi with a cake. She was doing a special cake for my son. We had to cut the cake to make it level, and the GB's kept coming in the kitchen for pieces of the scraps. lol Lucas was first in line! 

While I was there visiting with Gabi in the kitchen Lucas came up to me and said "Gramma?! You made me poo-poo." I just started at him for a second, then I laughed and said "Yes. I did." He was referring to the whiteboard on the fridge. I had written a note on it the day they moved in that read's "Welcome Home 

Nick, Gabi,

 (GB1), Lucas

and (GB3)!"

Well...when they first got there, Lucas was calling everyone poo-poo. I told him one day that I wasn't the poo-poo, that he was. Then I wiped off his name and wrote poo-poo instead. He didn't like that.

So when he told me that i had made him "poo-poo" he was referring to the board, and that I had changed his name. I asked him if he wanted me to change it back. He said yes, and gave me his one nod-nod of the head. I wiped off the poo-poo name and rewrote Lucas. He smiled. I picked him up and showed him where I changed it. Then I made him promise not to call anyone poo-poo anymore or I would change it back. He said he wouldn't. I tried to give him a kiss, but he leaned back and turned his head. I got him anyways on the cheek and neck and put him down, saying "Gramma Loves you!" and giving him a pat on the hiney. He ran off to play. I eventually went home. It was the last time I saw him.

 Sunday February 17th

I stayed home from church. I had a nagging headache that was threatening to become a migraine. My husband and kids left for church. Nick was going to take the family, but they ended up staying home. Nick and Gabi took naps while the littles were "sleeping". Apparently while everyone else was sleeping, Lucas took a Sharpie marker to the walls, the fridge, chairs, boxes....basically everywhere. Nick came down to the house and was lamenting to me about it. All I could do was giggle. How could he possibly get mad? Or even upset? He used to do the same thing! I have pictorial proof....somewhere. So we sat talking for about an hour. My husband and kids came home form church and we had a nice dinner. 

Monday February 18th

I woke up to my phone alarm going off. Time to get #5 up, and out the door for the school bus. It was cold that morning. But, not freezing. Foggy. I prayed as I walked back to the camper. I prayed that #5 would have a good day. I had no idea of what was about to happen. If only I had.

I went back in, laid back down with #6 laying next to me. We slept for another hour or two. Then I got up, fed #6 and started the day. I had some phone calls to make, had to pay some bills. I had a chat with Lisa.Then I said goodbye to my daughter as she left for a day of fun with her BFF. They were celebrating the day off from school. My son, #4 went out to work on his truck. I did the dishes and switched a load of laundry and sat down to look at Pinterest. Gabi came up to use my wi-fi. She was trying to sign up for a business venture. Looking for a way to make money and stay home with the boys. #6 went outside to play. Gabi and I sat at the table, side by side at our laptops, she was on the phone with her Aunt trying to get the sign up process done. After a while she was done, we chatted a bit, and she left to go check on her sleeping baby. GB1 had kept coming in and out the whole time she was there. #6 and GB2 never came in. Gabi went home to find that regardless what GB1 said, the other two boys weren't out back at her house. She thought they may have wok up the baby. She got there, no boys and baby still asleep. She came back and asked if the boys were at my place. No. We checked the camper and the house. Nothing. #4 hadn't seen them. It was Monday, e mail day for our missionary. I had been messaging with him through e mail. Now I had to tell him we were searching for the boys. I figured they were hiding somewhere. GB1 kept saying they were playing hide and seek. If only.

It just became the worst day of our lives.

Gramma Rose

Grampa & Gramma Rose

What can I say?.....

They are awesome!

64 years together
5 kids
16 grandkids
more than 45 great-grandkids
5great-great grandkids!

Missing them greatly right now!

My Grandmother is in the ICU in CA. I am here at home in TN, 2000 miles away.

My heart is breaking at the thought that I won't get to see or talk to her again. 

I have been praying that this would not happen, for some time. I am not ready.

I am so not ready. 

Seriously? How do you prepare for this?

I need to see her. Hold her hand. Talk with her. Kiss her cheek. See her smile.

I know there's not much I feel I need to say. Pretty sure we said it all. 

But I would like ONE more chance to say,

 I Love You.

With all my heart.

With all my soul.

I know she will be there waiting for me when I return home.

But how long will I have to be without her?

I won't have her whispering sweet advice or funny things to me.

Asking, every Monday, how Jake is doing on his mission.

I'm not ready.

She knew my older two kids. She was there for their births. She's met H when H was only a couple of months old. Met B when he was a few years old. But has never met the two youngest. She has only seen my kids from great distance in pictures. Heard them on the phone. 

She has sent all of my kids blankets over the years. The last time was when the youngest was born. She gave him one and D another one. Those are the last ones. I will have to pick up the tradition. Her's are cherished heirlooms. 

I'm not ready.

So, not ready.

Honey said if I need to go, he'll send me.

I just may need a flight.....



UPDATE:
I went to California. I was there for 8 days. Flight days didn't count. I spent as much time as I could with my Grandmother. I sat by her side. Mostly saying nothing. Sometimes chattering away. She was mostly there with me, but sometimes I could feel she was not. The first thing she wrote down for me was....Orange Sunkist. Her favorite drink. She had the ventilator tube in and couldn't drink anything. When she finally got that out, she said water never tasted so good! There were a couple of touch and go moments. We thought she was losing the battle. She would have such a hard time breathing. Then they brought up hospice care. I had such a hard time accepting that this would be it. Could be it.
But she wasn't ready. I could see it.
She wasn't.
She went home the same day I left. I didn't get to see her that day, my flight left early in the day. She's recovering like a champ! Who knew?!!
She's been dealing with congestive heart failure for years. It caught her by surprise this time around I think.
She has nurses that come in periodically to check in on her. My Grandfather is there to help her. He promised her that if she kept working at gaining her strength back and doing her exercises, he'd take her to church (this coming Sunday Feb 3rd)...guess who was up at 3am doing her exercises!!! LOL
GO GRAMMA!!!
I am so glad to be able to report that she is doing better!
I pray we have several years left to visit and make blankets together!!

P.S. Gramma, if you're reading this, I have to put the barn quilt on hold while we're under construction...but soon I will have one on the side of the shop to be sure!!
And I hope to have a rose quilt done by Christmas! But, again, I can't start until after construction...
Can't wait for you to see my creations!
I love you!

FINAL UPDATE:
Gramma passed away this morning at approximately 5:30 a.m. P.S.T.
She was reported to have passed peacefully, holding her youngest daughter's hand.
She made it to her 83rd birthday, almost two weeks ago.
We had an extra 3 months with her.
The last thing we talked about was her addiction.....
to orange Sunkist soda. lol
She will be missed greatly.
I already have been missing my weekly chats. We used to talk anywhere from once to five days of the week. It changed about 6 months ago. It turned into maybe a short chat 3 times a week. Then maybe once a week. Then, just random phone calls.